Apple, Facebook & Google Facing Privacy Issues & Virgin’s Porn Battle
You can see the healmarks of Google, Facebook & Apple all over Silicon Valley as they finally get dragged into line to deal with the issue none of them really wants to deal with: privacy. First of all the White House has called on internet firms to develop stonger privacy protections for customers amid ‘worries’ that users browsing data is being sold to advertisers. Not so much of a worry as a dead certainty if you ask me. How else did these guys get so rich?
Second big privacy story with these guys is that the State of California has issued an accord which Apple and Google have consented to, allowing greater privacy protection for customers when they download apps. About time. With all this data harvesting, these guys are starting to look creepier than a politicans pet spider.
And now for some news about people who could probably use some privacy by the looks of things. Richard Branson has just won a legal battle for use of the domain name “richardbranson.xxx” Now if that doesn’t send all sorts of unappealing images into your head, (I was thinking naked old British tycoons. What were you thinking?) I don’t know what will. Some Australian had registered the name in ‘bad faith’ and Branson took him to court and told him whats what. I’m pretty sure Dick, sorry Richard won’t be using the domain for any serious commercial venture. At least I hope not!
That’s all for now.
Off the record, hush hush and always on the QT.
Keep it private y’all
Stan Buyme
Twitter Flying High on Data, Carriers take a Hit and Welcome to Miami
So whats new in the world of privacy? I guess everybody thinks this whole Twitter privacy row is for the birds (sorry, I cant resist a good pun!). If you missed the big hoo-ha you can read the coverage on the BBC website here . What do I think? Cant say I’m surprised. Facebook, Google and all those big cats build their empires on advertising data. User data that helps companies target their ads more effectively is like gold dust. So now with all this data, Twitter ads are more effective and see more hits than Michael Corleone.
And how about this for a hit? Text Apps took $13.9bn from mobile carriers in 2011. You know the ones Im talking about; Whats App, Viber, Skype and even Facebook Messenger. I got a little message of my own for the mobile phone operators: snap out of it ya bunch of dumb-asses! If you guys don’t sort out your businesses you’re gonna be on the wrong end of an even bigger hit when voice revenue disappears. Wake up or you guys’ll be sleepin with the fishes. Don’t say I didn’t warn ya!
Well I promised ya some photos of the Loky staff doing their thing in Miami at the Internet Dating Conference 2012. Well, I’m not one to disappoint so here’s a photo of the exhibition stand and a couple more from the iDate Awards: Photo 1, Photo 2, Photo 3. What a good looking bunch of people, huh?
That’s all for now.
Off the record, hush hush and always on the QT.
Keep it private y’all
Stan Buyme
Stan’s Blog: Special Report from iDate Miami, Zucks Bucks and Motorola Make Apple Crumble in Germany
It’s a tough life I tell ya. Just got back from the Internet Dating Conference in Miami, Florida and whoa it sure is hot down there. It was a real hard week, going to all these swanky parties hanging with the great and the good of the dating industry and making sure they’re all OK for mobile privacy in between trips to the beach and mojitos on Ocean Drive. I gotta give props to Marc Lesnick for throwing a hell of a party…er…I mean….organising a real good conference. Watch this space for photos of the Loky team doin their thing in the Sunshine State.
So Facebook’s finally gonna go ahead with an IPO for $5bn. That means that Zuckerberg kid’s gonna be even richer. Hey kid, I sure hope you got a good solid pre-nup if you ever decide to tie the knot with that Chinese broad. Don’t let her catch you with no funny stuff on your phone, ya hear? I see his salary is gonna be $1 in 2013. Dude, you need to talk to the union!
And Apple, you guys need to talk to your lawyers. The ones in Germany in particular. You guys just got your asses kicked in the courtroom by Motorola and now a bunch of your gadgets including an iPhone and 2 iPads are off the webstore shelves. Ouch! That’s gotta hurt! Remember folks Motorola make Android handsets and are owned by Google. This could get dirtier than a Hell’s Kitchen fist fight! Hello Moto!
That’s all for now.
Off the record, hush hush and always on the QT.
Keep it private y’all
Stan Buyme
Stan’s Blog: Nokia Get Bold over Windows Phone at CES, Twitter Narked at Google and iPhone 4S Withdrawn in China
Well if it isn’t our ol’ pal Stephen Elop, CEO of Nokia, back in the news making big bold statements about the future of Windows Phone 7 and in the process having a swipe at Samsung & HTC. Now, I’m on record as having less than savoury things to say about our Canadian friend’s optimism. I’ll say this though. Nice phone, that Lumia. But your market share’s at 2%. Less of the chit-chat, get the finger out and lets see how you’re doing this time next year.
So a little birdie tells me Twitter are going a little cuckoo at the fact that Google are showing Google + results a lot more so than Twitter results in Google searches and apparently Twitter’s lawyer tweeted that this was a ‘bad day for the internet’. Aw poor little birdie. Welcome to the real world kiddo. These are voracious companies you’re competing with. When the big birds come to feed, it aint time to hibernate!
In other news, Apple have temporarily suspended sales of the iPhone 4S in China after two scalpers started doing Kung Fu on each other outside a store. This is all in the interests of security and protection of store employees. Nothing to do with patent wars with Samsung or communist governments making absurd demands. Tell ya the truth I could care less if they withdrew em from stores in Manhattan or anywhere else. Im hanging on for the 5!
For more Apple related violence, click here to watch this hilarious video.
That’s all for now.
Off the record, hush hush and always on the QT.
Keep it private y’all
Stan Buyme
Stan’s Blog: Digital Ads For Politicians, Facebook Business Cards and Samsung Have High Hopes
Seems like only yesterday Hilary and Barack were going at it hammer and tongs (so to speak) in the battle for the Democratic nomination. Well its election time again already and Barack and Mitt are battling it out for the votes of Americans while the drama of the Democratic nomination is foregone. Only this time their sizeable respective budgets are being funnelled into digital advertising. A survey has found that campaigners are putting 100% more budget towards digital advertising with Facebook being the medium of choice. That’s all fine by me but I got one question. If they allow politicians to advertise on Facebook, will they allow other criminals to do likewise? I wonder if the Gambinos would be bothered with digital media.
Or maybe they’d have used Facebook’s new social business cards offer. Zuckerberg and co. have partnered with Moo to offer 200,000 lucky punters a free social business card package that uses your timeline photos to make the card look pretty. Aint that neat? After the first 200k are snapped up, you gotta pay. I’m not sure if I made those cards with my current timeline photos Id look too smart. I can see it now. Walk into a business meeting and hand over a card. Nice to meet ya. Stan Buyme. Here’s my card. Call me. When you’ve finished looking at me and my secretary sucking face in a corner of Doc Watsons bar!
Anybody notice Samsung’s predicting bumper profits next year with their hopes being pinned on bumper smartphone sales. They reckon profits will grow by 5 trillion Korean Won. In case you’re wondering how much that is, it’s about the same amount it cost to do the propaganda campaign around Kim Jong Il’s funeral! Good luck to Samsung. I hope you don’t get nuked by those nutcases in North Korea.
That’s all for now.
Off the record, hush hush and always on the QT.
Keep it private y’all
Stan Buyme
Stan’s Blog: Blackberry With Your Turkey, Sir? Google’s Self-Driving Car, Apple’s Christmas Present & This Christmas I Can Have It
Now if you think you’ve got a big Christmas turkey, here’s a bigger one. RIM have announced that the Blackberry 10 won’t be available until late 2012 blaming everything on delays in chip availability. As if things weren’t going badly enough for the smartphone manufacturer, this will ensure a frosty end to their annus horibbilis. Earlier in the year RIM saw its brand demolished when Blackberry became the official technology partner of the London riots when hoodlums started organising their activity on BBM. Then there was that huge outage back in October and now this. Well tis the season of goodwill so I’m not going to slate RIM too much. Bah, Humbug! What a bunch of knuckleheads. I’ve no sympathy for an organisation that sat back and idly watched Apple eat it’s lunch and pop the bag when the iPhone went after business users. Deer. Headlights. Car crash. Those guys obviously never had a timely visit from the ghost of Christmas future! I’ve had a lot of cranberry and turkey in my time, but lately I’m starting to to see a lot of Blackberry and turkey.
A car that drives itself? Sounds perfect for getting me home from the bar after a few glasses of mulled wine this festive season. Also sounds like Google are scraping the bottom of the barrel when it comes to publicity after recently winning a patent for a self-driving car. Can I really see myself down in Autogiant struggling to decide between the Nissan, the Ford and the Google? Gimme a break. Why doesn’t Larry Page go on Google.com and run a search for ‘sensible business strategies’. Stick to the knitting fellas.
Well shiver me timbers the music pirates are being given an amnesty by Apple. So if you’ve illegally downloaded, ripped, zipped or burned all your Christmas Carols, you can get a better version for a small fee on Apple’s Music Match service. For a £21.99 annual charge, users can match and replace up to 25,000 songs stored on their computer, including CD-rips as well as tracks obtained by other means. Dear Santa, it looks like my Very Sinatra Christmas might be needing a makeover.
That’s all for now.
Off the record, hush hush and always on the QT.
Keep it private y’all
And a very Merry Christmas
Stan Buyme
P.S. Oh by the way, if you’re looking for a little Christmas present like say oh I dunno a Ferrari maybe? Check out www.icanhaveit.com. and get playing. My favourite new site! Ho ho ho!!!
Stan’s Blog: Sorry Nokia, Twitter Stepping Up & Motorola Take a Bite Out of Apple
You may remember a couple of blogs ago, this blogger had some less than savoury things to say about Nokia’s chances of a resurrection based on the Lumia. Turns out our Finnish friends have been proving me wrong with a recent announcement that they’ve already sold out of Lumias in the UK. Apparently Lapland is in Finland. Maybe Santa Claus swung em an early Christmas present or something. Either way, it looks good for their forthcoming US launch and has certainly given me some food for thought about my philosophy on delivering my slant on the news: not always wrong but never in doubt! Good luck to em!
Good luck to Twitter too. Those plucky social media tweeps are really starting to man up and give Facebook and Google a run for their money. This week they announced a revamp of the service with personal Twitter profile pages, a new timeline and easier search. Word on the street is those guys are working off a valuation of about $7bn now. #inyourfacezuckerberg #googlethatlarrypage
It’s hard to write a tech blog these days without mentioning Apple. Bad news this week for the most valuable company in the world. Motorola has just won a patent fight in Germany. Apparently Apple failed to license one of Motorola’s patents and Apple may be forced to remove this feature from its devices. So much for the season of goodwill. Fellas, fellas its Christmas. Why don’t all you wiseguys settle down over a mince pie and some mulled wine and resume the conflict in January? I’d love to write some more on this one but all this talk of mulled wine and mince pies has got me distracted. I’m off to Doc Watsons on the Upper East Side.
That’s all for now.
Off the record, hush hush and always on the QT.
Keep it private y’all
Stan Buyme
Stan’s Blog: Funny Row for Carrier IQ, Larry Page is Dr. Evil and Twitter Makin a Buck
There are few things I like more in life than a good row. Maybe because I know how to handle myself or if I’m honest because I got pretty good back up. Anyhoo, there’s a big row brewing about how mobile carriers are snooping their customers’ data using a piece of software called Carrier IQ. Senator Al Franken is on the warpath with the company who say they help identify faults and don’t spy on customers. Al Franken may have started his career in comedy before getting into politics but something tells me he aint joking this time. Watch out boys. That goes for all the carriers who use it too. Let’s see who has the last laugh in this one.
Speaking of rows looks like Larry, Sergey and the boys in Google are looking to take on Amazon. So much so that they’re already in talks with a bunch of retailers like Macys and the Gap to undermine Amazon by offering cheap 24 hour delivery on lots of stuff. Didn’t I read recently that Steve Jobs advised Larry Page to do fewer things? Now they wanna get a slice of the retail pie. Come on! Google really is the new Microsoft – they wanna take over everything. I bet Larry’s got a big fat white cat like Blofeld in James Bond. But if this goes belly up, he could end up lookin a complete chump. A bit more Dr. Evil than Ernst Blofeld. Don’t be surprised if he holds the world to ransom for one miiiiillllion dollars muahahahahahaha!
And speaking of making millions of dollars, this week gave us a glimpse of how Twitter really makes money. Sponsored tweets, organic user interests and advertising campaigns. 2400 advertisers, 50 million users every day. Sheesh! This looks like a bigger money making racket than Tony Soprano’s waste management business. Maybe I’ll have 50 million daily followers of my Blog someday. Yeah and maybe I’ll stop smokin Cubans, sippin Hennessy and chasing dames.
That’s all for now.
Off the record, hush hush and always on the QT.
Keep it private y’all
Stan Buyme
Stan’s Blog: Cybersecurity from Dave, Apple Hacked and Humble Pie for Google this Thanksgiving
Today the UK government released its 2011 Cyber Security strategy. It promised ‘unprecedented cooperation’ with businesses to improve cybersecurity. When a politician says ‘unprecented cooperation’ with a business I take that to mean increased numbers of brown paper envelopes swapping hands. So how come you aint given us boys in Loky a call? We’re the real experts on privacy and security. I bet Mr. Cameron’s got some interesting texts on his phone. Hopefully he aint got no photos on his phones that need our app. Ewww! Yuk!!
Moving swiftly along to more security issues, this time affecting Apple. Looks like some hackers have targeted the iTunes store with a scam around fake gift certificates on Black Friday. Every weekend will be Black Friday if I can’t download my favourite Sinatra, Sammy and Deano tunes. And boy you don’t wanna put any malware on my iPhone. My 3GS has got enough problems trying to store the numbers of all the lovely ladies whose company I enjoy.
Speaking of Smartphones it would appear Google and Samsung are gonna have to eat some humble pie this Thanksgiving with the news that there’s a bug in the Galaxy Nexus. Apparently the volume shifts levels for no apparent reason. And after the humble pie, you might as well eat your ice cream sandwich for thanksgiving dessert if you can’t even get the basics right. I’m disappointed boys. Anyway, this Thanksgiving I’m thankful it’s Friday and my secretary Rita’s getting all dolled up for a drink with the boss. She aint no turkey!
That’s all for now.
Off the record, hush hush and always on the QT.
Keep it private y’all
& a Happy Thanksgiving Weekend!
Stan Buyme
Stan’s Blog: How Facebook Track You, ‘Bisexual’ Demi & Ashton Split and Clooney to Play Jobs.
Anybody read the article on Business Insider about how Facebook tracks all sorts of browsing behaviour of its users? This is to make its customers’ lives better right? To enhance the user experience surely? Nothing to do with driving ad revenue by gathering also sorts of creepy info about sites you visit. Yeah right and Donald Trump likes his wife for her personality. You won’t get much on me Zuckerberg; my browsing history’s pretty non-eventful. Although I always seem to get ads for all that kinky stuff when I login. Hmmm.
Looks like Ashton Kutcher aka Bruce Willis’ son and Demi Moore have decided to call it a day. It wasn’t much more than a year ago that Kutcher was reported to have had an affair with Brittney Jones who claimed all sorts of indecent messages and images were sent to her from the Two and Half Men star. Ashton you cudda been singin that Shaggy song with confidence if you had our app. It wasn’t me! I’m totally shocked that an ‘open’ marriage made in Hollywood between a supposed bisexual 49 year old and a 33 year old hasn’t worked out. Apparently they were having threesomes which became twosomes without Demi. I’m real glad that growing up as a Buyme my folks didn’t have such a colourful union.
Well well well, in other Apple news word on the street is that Steve Jobs is getting played by Georgie boy Clooney in an upcoming biopic. Aint he a little pretty to be playing Jobs? I just asked Siri to find me an actor who looked like me. Came back with choice of Johnny Depp or Brad Pitt. I always liked Apple products. Good luck at the Oscars Clooney!
That’s all for now.
Off the record, hush hush and always on the QT.
Keep it private y’all
Stan Buyme
